this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2026
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A socialist walks into a bar. He says that everyone who is able to pay for their own drink should, but those that cannot afford one can have one on the house and then the more wealthy patrons will reimburse the bar. Everybody has a good time.
A very specific Republican walks into a bar. He says that he is fabulously wealthy and that drinks are on him tonight. Everybody drinks to excess. The Republican refuses to pay his tab and leaves with his wealthy friends without saying a word. The bar tries to go after him, but he threatens to take them to court. The other patrons are either unable or unwilling to pay, having drank their fill on the promise that they would not have to. The bar cannot afford to fight a long legal battle, and cannot afford to pay their workers without reimbursement. The bar closes. The republican writes an op-ed in the local newspaper complaining about how homeless and minorities skipping out on their tabs is what killed his favorite bar.