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Brother it is 100% a wedge issue. Just like abortion. It's easy to get people riled up over anything related to sex and sexuality.
Nobody is going around thinking about other people abortions, or whether or not the garage matches the trim.
The thing is, social issues, when it comes to sex and sexuality, there's a whole distribution network for getting people riled up, and it's been around for centuries. The church.
You know the easiest way to strip someone of their humanity is to take away their agency over their sexual partners?
Doesn't matter if you're literally raping someone, forcibly breeding your slaves, or telling someone they aren't allowed to love someone else (whether because of race or passport or genitals). The net effect is the same - a piece of their humanity and agency is taken from them.
Anyway that deep-rooted Catholic shame is good for something...getting people uneasy talking about sex and sexuality (and the consequences therein). And when something outside the heteronormative comes up and makes them think about it, it makes them angry.
I appreciate your comment and perspective, and I do really think it's something that's missed by a lot of the compassionate social progressives. Acceptance is a good thing...but it can't be forced on everyone. Everyone has to get there on their own, and until they do, all this transgender talk makes them uneasy.