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cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/50137870
this post was submitted on 31 Jul 2026
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Yeah, I thought it was usually just:
Pay yourself in stocks.
Be rich enough to take loans from the bank regularly, living off debts that you periodically clear.
No income = no income taxes to pay.
Banks love you, as each loan gives them money and borrowing capacity.
If your company goes into terminal debt, create a new company to buy the debt so your company survives!
Keep control of the board of directors so that you can convince them to give you huge bonuses paid in stocks!
Pump up the stock price and then dump it before it drops in value.
Lobby the government to keep this system in place.
Donate to political campaigns so they understand they won't get elected without you!
Off shore accounts for the really illegal shit.
I'm so rich the laws don't apply to me!
I wonder what it's like to have sex with underaged girls? Or to kill a peasant?
I'm gonna hit on a Jr. staff member (I can't really date), we'll make an agreement then I'll name the kid after something dumb from my hobbies.
I refused to pay anything in the divorce.
People hate me, but money makes me happy! I'm just going to keep buying other companies rather than improving anything.
Oh using green energy means I can sell carbon credits to my other company that's actively killing the planet AND my company gets a tax break for it!
I love my yatch. I'm so far away from everyone. I do actually hate being alive still. Maybe the Ketamine and cocaine is fucking with my head. Glad I'm exempt from customs, I'm never going to change... Oops I got angry and hit my wife (who is young and far less wealthy).
I'm just going to hire people and management firms to do everything on this list for me. Including partying with me, and fighting with the wife.