this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2026
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As someone from the west coast and now living on the east coast, the number one thing I can say is.... the food sucks. All of it.
East coast food culture sucks.
Its either bland or some unholy pairing of bullshit (that also sucks). And I also think they go out of their way to make things wrong.
Try to order a "California Burrito" (if you dont know, Google it, pretty common), so what does Virginia think goes in it? Chicken, steak and shrimp and beans... thats not "choice of meat", that all 3 together. None of which is what is a California Burrito is...
Here in Viriginia they just fuck up everything. Order a Philly Cheesesteak... what do they put in it? Fucking lettuce and tomatoes.... what's not in it, fucking cheese. You get more authentic subs from big chains like Subway. Like these people dont have the internet to search.
Oh, and sit down at a Mexican restaurant, theyll bring you chips with white sauce. Everyone else is thinking "oh cool queso". No, not queso.... its mayo with some onion powder.... these mf serve tortilla chips with mayonnaise.....
What part of Virginia? cuz some parts are better than others
So, um, just curious, but which coast do you think those are from?
Listen, I know Philly is more east than west.... but Ive had a Philly cheesesteak on the west coast. It was awesome... now... explain this shit being served here in Virginia, on the east coast..
Is that a Philly? Do you wanna claim that?
To be fair... It says it is a Philly Steak Sub... Not a Cheesesteak. As a steak sub that's not a horrible combination.
But it is still clear what they're trying to sell and is an abomination.
That sandwich is a crime no matter what they're trying to call it
If you can't make it up to Philadelphia, DC has some good places for cheesesteaks. It's been a few years, but I'll see if I can find the name of the place I liked
Are you ok?
There no way they are. That sounds awful.
I had "chili" in Virginia once, and it was literally beans and tomatoes in water and salt.
I'm not gonna tell you what date this happened because I don't want the murders traced back to me.
I don't think anyone would move to convict
I nearly killed a local with my habanero guac.
Nearly? We expect better next time
No man.
Just grabbed some dinner with the kid at a Mexican restaurant in town.. all I wanted was a burrito and they wouldn't give it to me. Just one Cali burrito and they wouldn't give it to me.....
I'm not crazy. INSTITUTION!
You're the one that's crazy. INSTITUTION!
You're driving me crazy. INSTITUTION!
I'm glad someone got that, cuz I was gonna feel real fucking old.
I'm further North and we have great Mexican. I'm not sure about a California Burrito but I'll check it out!
Just tell them how to make it, or make sure they look it up. Don't let "get creative" with it. If it doesnt have fries IN the burrito, its not a california burrito.
Did you move from a more densely populated area to a less densely populated area? Because if I moved from my bigger city with amazing food to a nearby smaller city, my food options would immediately suck
I'm sorry you've been disappointed.
This is how villains are made.
Carne asada, guacomole salsa, pico de gallo, french fries, a bit of cheese. A BIT like a tiny bit.
Its not a fucking delicacy, its a drunken fools only hope at 4 AM. Its not meant for a plate. Burritos are not meant for church. Its not high fucking art. Its fucking food and its meant to be a way.
My man, my fucking man, let me show you this shit.
Restuarant 1
WITH fries. Like, as a side. Not in the burrito, neverminding everything else wrong.
Heres a different restaurant also nearby
Beans and rice? Wheres the fries??
Fucking google that shit.... its like everyone out here heard that California burritos are popular and did literally NO further looking into it. Just made some shit up.
And look at this shit... you see that white "dipping sauce" there? Thats not queso...
Damn, you weren’t even exaggerating a little.
Thanks for bringing the receipts on these atrocities, they’re both hilarious and heartbreaking 🥲
That second California burrito is definitely a Texas burrito. We do beans and rice in ours. I've literally never heard of fries going in a burrito, and the concept makes me uncomfortable lmao
Your burrito is now their burrito. This is what it feels like, btw.
Beat regards,
A hispanic
I mean. Somewhat.
Like its kind of bullshit to make a claim that this isn't appropriation/ gentrification/ whatever your proffered framing is. At the same time, Lola's 7 up in barrio Carlsbad has been around almost a hundred years. Some place in El Cajon, Escondido, spots in LA, all over southern California.. its not like the people living there stopped being Mexican when the border moved. And its truly injust to "make invisible" the people who have lived in some of these areas since it wasn't even Mexico, but Spain, and dismiss their cooking traditions because especially on the west coast of alta and baja california, the cultural centers weren't in modern Mexico. They were LA, Santa Barbara, San Diego, San Francisco (the mission, hello).
Sir, I've been waiting for my burrito for more than 2 hours now.
ok mijo calm down, i'll take you to lourdes and get you some chicken soup so you feel better
ayayayay qué rico! :D
Finally, I, a white man, knows what gentrification and cultural appropriation feels like. And it feels bad man.
Not sure what's going on here, but we had a different name for eating cum off a bland tortilla chip when I was a youth. We also didn't typically do it in restaurants.
Was the different name for cum chips "Tuesdays"?
No idea how to reply to this
Dont lose eyecontact and it wont be your problem.
At least thats what I recall..
What part of Virginia? Hampton Roads is basically only good for seafood, but they are good at it. Northern Virginia has diverse and interesting ethnic food options, but you have to look for them. Richmond I assume is the same. Western Virginia is kind of rural sprawl but the southern food is great.
As someone from the southeast I had the opposite reaction when visiting Cali. I felt like there was no soul in that food at all. More healthy tho.
Edit: Rethinking it, I'm actually sure there's good and bad in both places.
If youre visiting, get away from the tourist shops. This is true when you're visiting anywhere. Don't eat the food made for tourists.
Ask a local, find some place that has a dude selling burritos out of an unmarked doorway counter. If you see an old mexican lady wandering around with a ice chest behind her, shes selling homemade tamales, get that shit.
Food near tourist areas is made bland af to appeal the widest visiting audience.
As another person from the southeast, similar is true down here and most places: a locally known and mildly sketchy situation is the best! (Usually..)
Gas station places with a packed parking lot, open church bbqs, the smoky old dark wood panel places serving the best burger you ever had.
That said, the first time I had a proper tamale when I moved to Texas, omgosh! Magic.
... How did we get here from mountains?
please keep the convo on track. we're talking about burritos
...what are those things on the right?
That I have but one upvote to give!
Here, have some Lemmy gold 🥫 (it's a can of beans)
We talking about burritos now.
You need to hit up the south. Amazing food. Sure the weather is hot af, the politics are fucking terrible, and you'll probably get some odd looks of you're not white.
But boy....that food. Put some pounds on you quick but you'll leave fat and sassy
Your spoon may be too big though.
Correct, barbeque from the south, dessert from the Amish, Italian from New York and nearby Italian grandmother's. If you get a burrito from some place that's bad that doesn't mean there isn't top tier food there.
how do they fuck that up lol the main thing that separates a cali burrito and a burrito is the french fries being IN the burrito. thats like one of the lowest hanging fruits to fuck up.
Right? And it would be one thing if just one restaurant fucked it up. You'd be like "well that restaurant is just dumb".... but its like..ALL of them. All of them fuck it up in different ways.
Its baffling....