This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
Hey Anon, you did great!
In this situation, as in many in life, Judo rules apply: Go with the punch, don't push against it.
This was a win, you just need to recognize it as that.
keep it up, don't lose heart, you'll find your match.
For real, I can probably count on my hands the number of times I tried cold approaches like that in my life. Especially with a pack of girls. Super duper ballsy of Anon. Much respect.
Great comment, cold approaching in any situation can be intimidating but at the end of the day the worst that can happen is they say "no". And then you can go home and get high or drunk or whatever and not care. Each rejection hurts a little less each time.
I mean, better solution is to go hang with your friends and commiserate. Which, imo, is always something dating advice seems to avoid talking about. Dating is hard. Having a solid social support system to pick you back up again is crucial.
That’s when you go “Oh Okay, I can see why your single” and walk away like a boss
Sounds to me like you just dodged a bullet, mate.
Absolutely. Anyone willing to treat a stranger this way is unequivocally a shitbag.
She will die alone, whether she is married or not.
Nah but for real if some random stranger at a bar overheard me saying I'm single and then came up to me and my friends like that I would be a little creeped out too.
I wouldn't be mean about it, but I definitely wouldn't say yes.
For sure and that's alright. But at the same time pubs are called that because they are a public space, hence you usually don't expect actual privacy and it's what leads to moments of joy when things randomly fall into place. Could be creepy, could be magical.
Anon gave it a try, failed his landing (asking a girl out was a bit much, he could have just offered a drink and joined in on the convo), but he shouldn't feel so bad about it.
It sucks that he doesn't have mates he can laugh about it with though. That's the real tragedy to me.
This is definitely one of those 'creepy if ugly' moments. If he was a handsome guy, it would be romantic and has almost definitely happened in a million Hallmark movies.
Listening in on conversations is creepy, no matter how good-looking a person is.
And that stuff happens in movies doesn't mean it isn't creepy in real-life.
Not really. If you were discussing with somebody about some terminal illness you were raising money for and somebody approached and said: "Sorry, but I overheard what you said and I'd love to donate, if that's okay" that would not be creepy in the slightest.
There is a difference between 'overhearing' and 'purposefully spying'
Well, OP wasn't donating money, was he?
The scenario you brought up would be creepy too, but people tend to value money over the slight discomfort of creepiness.
In what world is it creepy to overhear somebody saying something in a public place? Have you ever been in a social situation before?
In what world is it not creepy to butt into some strangers' personal conversation after overhearing details that were clearly not addressed to you?
Have you ever been in a social situation before?
There is context and nuance to everything. If you think this situation is ALWAYS creepy then I'm afraid you are objectively incorrect.
Children walk up to each other on a playground and butt in and make friends happily. Why do you want us all to be boring robots that never interface?
You are probably not wrong, super attractive people can get away with cringy things. Wouldn't be a good strategy for an average looking person, however.
No wonder she's single.
"Sorry, from across the bar I couldn't see how ugly your personality was. It all makes sense now."
Now we know why she’s single
I mean, considering there’s a 100% chance this is just a fantasy in anon’s head I’d say she dodged a bullet.
Thats why she cant find a man! Lesson here dont approach women that say “they cant find a man” there is a reason they cant find a man and you should believe her. What you did was courageous and this shouldn’t stop you from trying in the future.
I assumed they laughed at her because she actually IS that desperate but in denial about it.
The amount of people that assume laughter is directed at them in a scenario like this instead of the friend or even just a reaction to something uncomfortable is too high.
Fake: anon approached a girl
Gay: anon was daydreaming for 3 hours about getting engaged
Guy's a creepo, gal puts people down unnecessarily. Both will unwillingly die alone.
Why is the guy a creep?
What he says boils down to "I was eavesdropping your conversation, and I assume you're desperate. You might as well lower your standards — date someone random you have no connections with, like me." It's bad; not bad enough to deserve that rude reply, but still bad.
A better approach would be to try to pick up a woman who's alone, offer her a drink*, chitchat a bit, and then ask her for a date. With no references to what she said to other people. Creating some connection between him and her, before he asks her out.
*always ask the bar workers to bring it. Don't bring it yourself.
A better approach would be to try to pick up a woman who’s alone, offer her a drink*,
A bit of a tangent, but I really hate this. Not meaning to call you out, this is a really common recommendation for an icebreaker and it's also reinforced by popular media and the like, but it always feels to me like the implication is that if a man wants to approach a woman, they must buy something for them as part of that process. Like it's a transaction fee to be given a chance.
Nah its not creepy. Its perfectly fine to ask her out like that she just didnt want it and rejected him in a bit of an over the top way. Whole thing is no issue. If you are gonna randomly strike up conversations you will get cooked sometimes.
He's not a creep, but he has the emotional intelligence of an insurance investigator.
"Hi, you sound needy and vulnerable" is a rough starting point for a pickup line. He clearly didn't mean it as an insult, but it's not hard to imagine a woman in that situation being embarrassed, feeling exposed, and being insulted by the implication that this guy might be trying to capitalize on her moment of vulnerability.
Hurt-people hurt people.
I can't imagine why no one would want her with that shining personality
Dodged a bullet.
Fake: Anon left the house
Gay: Anon was a girl this whole time
Super rude on her part, but it's also extremely intrusive, rude, and weird to walk up to a total stranger you've never even talked to and ask her to dinner solely because you've been sitting alone at the bar for three hours overhearing her complain to her friends about being single. I'm not saying it can't work if you're physically like an 8–10/10, but that's effectively all she has to go on besides this obviously weird thing you're doing.
"I'm not desperate" could totally be referring to what he did rather than how he looks. This is George Costanza shit.
Um, this is the point of going on a date? To get to know someone new? She shouldn't need anything else to go on until after they've spent some time getting to know each other? A first date is not a lifetime commitment.
How else do you get a date with someone, if not by asking them?
The point of going on a date is getting to know somebody better because you're interested in them. Why on Earth would this woman be interested in this weirdo who she knows nothing about except, at most, that he sat alone at a bar for three hours straight, listened to her conversation, and interrupted her to ask her to dinner on the premise that she needs saving from being single specifically by him?
Remember boys: greentext is made up and didn't happen.
You can't be the victim and a Victor, you made your choice.
Worst she can do is say "no"