11pm. Early enough that they can't just ignore it until morning and will have to search the entire house, unable to sleep until the find it.
this post was submitted on 21 Jan 2026
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I hate speakers with open bluetooth. I'd rather have to press a button than let anyone in range potentially have control, partially for shit like this, partially just because someone looking to connect to their own device might pick mine on the list if theirs isn't showing up.
My soundbar is very good at always showing up on that bluetooth device list and I have had neighbours randomly connect to it. I'll usually turn the bt off at that point, but it's usually on because I use it sometimes. Just wish it had some sort of security instead of being designed for people who might have enough trouble getting the power on.
3am.
So, they're flirting?
Brad had this coming. He's such a cunt.
But besides that, play water dripping and pouring late at night when he definitely sleeps and enjoy the thought of him waking up in a pissed bed.
I once discovered that the waffle house jukebox is accessible online. Me and some friends were drinking and played all star for 4 hours straight. Someone tried at one point to insert other songs, but there was an option to give your song priority.
The jukebox went dead around 3am.
The local bars near me have that, and I can reach them from my house.
My playlists always begin and end with Photograph by Nickleback, and in between is... interesting. I like to ease in with a few weird-for-a-bar but not bad (My Heart Will Go On, some Babymetal, etc) and work my way toward the really weird (showtunes, especially from Avenue Q), ending with the bad (like the 30 minute Sufjan Stevens song). Then Nickleback again, and back to your country music.
Local bars here have the same thing.
The app won't let you play the same song twice in a row. But, if it's the same song on a different album, no worries.
My go to is 5 or 6 sweet home Alabamas in a row. I've only done 2 or 3 times, much to my friends chagrin.
These days I get side eyes from the very first sweet home Alabama. Heck, I'll be sitting home on my couch and get texts from buddies, "are you screwing with me? Are you playing sweet home Alabama right now?!"
Usually it wasn't me. Usually. 🤫
I've ruined a few people's good time of this lol, sorry! If I'm sitting in a bar and hear the same song more than 2x in a row, I've been known to pull out the flipper zero and skip your songs. Hell I've done it when someone played the Kid Rock version of Sweet Home Alabama once lol.
I've got an f0, mind sharing that ir file? Sounds delightful lol
https://github.com/UberGuidoZ/Flipper/tree/main/Sub-GHz
Sub-ghz. The brute forcing sometimes works, but it helps that I was able to borrow the remote for my local watering hole and copy their specific remote while the bartender was otherwise occupied.
Thanks! I had no idea. I've had my flipper in a box most of the last year, guess I'll dig it out haha
I would've opted for the and they don't stop coming version of the song. I love this way too much. It's pitch corrected so that it still follows the song properly and isn't just a loop of one section of the song.
ngl I was expecting something waaay more perverse. Maybe I just have issues
Start it at night when his bedroom light goes off for him to sleep. Let it go for approximately 30 seconds after his light turns on so he gets up to check then cut it off. Repeat until you're tired enough that's it's no longer worth the joy. You can also raise the volume slowly when he decides he's going to sleep through it and deal with it tomorrow
I must say, playlist on shuffle of 1-30 minutes of silence and one single chirp seems equally devious while also not requiring you to stay up. Loop the playlist over the course of an hour, let the shuffle adjust how long between chirps each one is
I feel like this might violate the Geneva convention
Canadian rule of the Geneva convention: It's not a war crime the first time!
It isn't written down or agreed to by UN member states, so it's a-ok to do here
If it's not a war but just a special pettiness operation, the Geneva conventions don't hold.
If you're monitoring his movements, I'd go with a dripping tap sound. Just enough irregularity in the timing to keep it interesting. Silence it every time he gets out of bed.
I'd use the sound of a cricket or some kind of insect. Make him paranoid and spend all his time hunting for an imaginary bug
3 seconds of mosquitoes buzz, like it just swooped near. That’d do it for me.
Guys, leave Brad alone, his family has gone through enough after what Cracker Barrel did to his wife.
Initially connect when the target isn't home, as a number of speakers make a distinct "startup" noise when a device connects.
After that, bear in mind that most bluetooth speakers have a small delay before they play audio, and this often means that the first second or so of audio will be cut off. Unless you use another app to keep a constant silent noise playing. The silence being sent as audio to play effectively "warms up" the speaker so the cut off portion is during the silence, not the actual noise you want. Some speakers need this silence to be infintessimally quiet static, as they'll just drop pure silence. Pretty sure there's an app on F-Droid for this.
You wouldn't want your friend to only hear part of the chirp after all.
Also, most devices with a screen have a way to display the name of what device is connected. This especially applies to casting to screens. Name your phone something generic for safety.
All day Christmas, if Brad hosts family at his house.
2AM
They should just kiss already.
Seems like a perfect opportunity to ram ranch him, but the smoke alarm chirps are solid and potentially longer lasting
The great things about the chirps is that you can space them randomly quite far apart from each other so that he can never get quite enough data to locate them.
This is exactly why it's so nefarious. Without a constant sound he won't be able to locate where it's coming from, and so you can keep the chirps going for days or weeks on end while the guy tears his house apart looking for a smoke alarm that doesn't exist
Occasionally play two chirps together to make it sound like two devices and toast.
Man, that is some diabolical stuff, there...
Taking one from the Amelie playbook I see
I'm trying to figure out whether this is a felony or not under the notorious CFAA
In practice, any ordinary computer has come under the jurisdiction of the law, including cellphones, due to the interstate nature of most Internet communication.
Maybe it depends on whether those speakers are only bluetooth or somehow internet connected?
I zoomed in to see Dad more clearly and the first words that came to my mind "Dad's a choad." Whatever that means.
Sounds like repressed love affair.
apple a day