Memes

Specifically American boomer, and something that's still going on. There was a thread here on lemmy a while ago that was about how american culture is very different from much of the world in terms of how much the father does in the things mentioned here. That a lot of the world have had it kinda even for many decades and some places even centuries.

Bullshit. This is stupid, generalising and damaging in just the same way as memes about how women get married and stop having sex.

Those stupid sexist memes are also not about all women.

My wife is in labor as we speak! Crazy how I'm sitting here this meme feels very reIevant. I aspire to not be this guy.

my favorite part, is it's never that the author of the meme is the one who just... picks shitty people. It's always the fault of the entire gender, clearly.

I've met plenty of shitty women, men, and trans folks. and plenty of great ones. It's almost as if being a shitty friend/partner has nothing to do with someone's sex or gender, and it's about their actions as an individual person. and frankly, if someone is shitty to you it's your job to end the relationship, not to continue with it and expect them to be better than they have demonstrated themselves to be. whenever my exes did shitty things, it was over and I'm glad for that because now I don't have a shitty partner that I married to and full of resentment and frustration that they refuse to take take on their fair share of adult responsibilities, who also resents me for not doing more for them while I was already doing 150%.

and almost like blaming the entire other gender is the point, because it absolves you of the responsibility of your own choices or worse, the blame of your unspoken expectations.

The number one way (more effective than medication) to increase a woman's libido is an extra hour of sleep. It's truly no wonder that getting negative hours of sleep for a literal year at least kills libido.

I'm pregnant and the insomnia is killing me. 4 or 5 hours a night, usually. And the poor sleep will only continue when the child is born. Everyone's talking about how men need to help more with chores and all that's true and good that you need division of labor, but even if you're good at division, the sleep loss with children is inevitable.

This is why both parents should get parental leave. I just took care of all the nights and slept through half the day while my partner handled those hours. Neither of us had to deal with sleep deprivation.

with this post?

it's rage bait. they want to get engagement by playing into grievance stereotypes. and people are happy to respond with either their bias confirmation or their counter-argument.

it's trolling, essentially.

Not a lot of people understand what parenting is going to be like before they have kids.

I got 3 months paid paternity leave through a state program. A coworker who had a kid that same month chose to not use the state program and take 2 PTO days instead. I talked to him before hand and told him about the program but he said something like "I wouldn't be much help, she's done it twice already so she has it handled". It was very evident how his wife felt about him at the Christmas party that year.

She sought out my wife, who she knew had a kid recently too and my wife brought up how nice it was to have me home for those first few months and somehow the state program came up in the conversation. She then booked it over to me and asked me about it, not knowing what was going on or thinking much about it, I told her about it and that I can't believe coworker didn't do it. Then all hell broke loose. This tiny little lady dragged out my 6 foot heavy set coworker by the ear, calling him every name in the book. She made him use all his PTO days and went to spend new years somewhere warm. He bitched about how hard it was taking care of 3 kids on his own for weeks.

'Funny' enough all the guys in the office thought she was being ridiculous but all the women were praising her.

Here in Denmark people believe in shared parenting, so both parents get leave. "Parental leave" as opposed to "maternal" or "paternal" leave.

My work gives parental leave based on whether they're the primary caretaker or the secondary one. The primary gets 6 months, the secondary gets 3.

What decider whether you're primary or secondary? Simple. If your partner is taking more than 3 months they're primary.

What this means in practice is that for US-based employees pretty much everyone at my company is the primary caretaker since few people's spouses even have the option for more than 3 months.