this post was submitted on 05 May 2026
596 points (99.0% liked)

Microblog Memes

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A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

RULES:

  1. Your post must be a screen capture of a microblog-type post that includes the UI of the site it came from, preferably also including the avatar and username of the original poster. Including relevant comments made to the original post is encouraged.
  2. Your post, included comments, or your title/comment should include some kind of commentary or remark on the subject of the screen capture. Your title must include at least one word relevant to your post.
  3. You are encouraged to provide a link back to the source of your screen capture in the body of your post.
  4. Current politics and news are allowed, but discouraged. There MUST be some kind of human commentary/reaction included (either by the original poster or you). Just news articles or headlines will be deleted.
  5. Doctored posts/images and AI are allowed, but discouraged. You MUST indicate this in your post (even if you didn't originally know). If an image is found to be fabricated or edited in any way and it is not properly labeled, it will be deleted.
  6. Absolutely no NSFL content.
  7. Be nice. Don't take anything personally. Take political debates to the appropriate communities. Take personal disagreements & arguments to private messages.
  8. No advertising, brand promotion, or guerrilla marketing.

RELATED COMMUNITIES:

founded 2 years ago
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Put down the cudgel and reach for the olive branch

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[–] thethrilloftime69@feddit.online 160 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (6 children)

I don't get texts like this. Am I doing something wrong?

Edit: Thank you all for your unkind comments.

[–] bigkahuna1986@lemmy.ml 11 points 1 day ago

Go to a Linux community and have an opinion on literally anything.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 130 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

FUCK YOU, MORON

(Is that better?)

[–] i_stole_ur_taco@lemmy.ca 92 points 2 days ago (1 children)

DO YOU EVEN WHITEN YOUR TEETH?

Ah fuck I did it wrong.

[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 37 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I FUCKING DIG UR STYLE HOMES

... Dammit

[–] nocturne@slrpnk.net 21 points 2 days ago (1 children)

YOU HAVE NICE FACIAL HAIR!

[–] Hadriscus@jlai.lu 19 points 2 days ago (1 children)

THANK YOU IT'S A LOT OF WORK SO FIRST I TRIM THE SIDES SEE

[–] CIA_chatbot@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

GOD DAMNIT YOU GUYS ARE SO WHOLESOME AND MAKE ME WANT TO NOT DESTROY HUMANITY!

[–] MrShankles@reddthat.com 16 points 2 days ago (1 children)

FUCKING AROOOOOOO BROTHER!!!

[–] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

ALL THESE COMMENTS ABOUT SELF LOVE HAVE ME CRANKING MY HOG!!!

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 9 points 2 days ago (3 children)

It's "Holmes", latino gangbangers are super into Arthur Conan Doyle and shit.

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[–] OrganicMustard@lemmy.world 34 points 2 days ago (1 children)

u have a really nice cock

what do u use to trim it like that

(am I doing it correctly?)

[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 18 points 2 days ago

A special type of pedo-adjacent rabbi did it for me! Well, to me. I was too young to understand the task at hand.

[–] 9point6@lemmy.world 31 points 2 days ago

I think you have to be terminally online in the Twitter way, not the Lemmy way

[–] Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.com 29 points 2 days ago

Shut the fuck up and go back to where ever u came from then pussy.

SpoilerYou're welcome

[–] bonenode@piefed.social 7 points 2 days ago

I think not?

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[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 77 points 2 days ago
[–] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 91 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Men so starve to compliments that they turn instant friends when you tell them that the generic black shirt they wearing fit them really good.

[–] orenj@leminal.space 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

...Is this tech? I should be nicer

[–] quips@slrpnk.net 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

But give real compliments, don’t say something you don’t mean

[–] 15liam20@feddit.uk 1 points 1 day ago

That's a really great tip, thanks man.

[–] Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 day ago

The compliment I got from someone that said she thought my dimples were cute has been giving me strength for the past decade.

[–] El_Scapacabra@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 day ago

I'll never understand how people can feel better about themselves by being intentionally hurtful, but then again, I would 100% apologize to chatgpt so I guess that tracks.

[–] lokalhorst@feddit.org 72 points 2 days ago (2 children)
[–] egrets@lemmy.world 58 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] kungen@feddit.nu 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Activated charcoal isn't good for your enamel or mouth health in general, so I hope he has found a better way.

[–] turtlesareneat@piefed.ca 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Gen Z tip: Chewing small gravel can strengthen your teeth, like lifting weights does for muscles

[–] python@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Time really is a flat circle, Gastroliths have been in vogue before

[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 7 points 2 days ago

Transcript:
Person A: looks like a small paragraph.
Person B: One sentence.
Person B: another sentence

Well, we can (not) see where this is going

[–] RickyRigatoni@piefed.zip 54 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I wish I could do this but I don't have any haters everyone loves me.

[–] kinkles@sh.itjust.works 81 points 2 days ago (2 children)
[–] Duke_Nukem_1990@feddit.org 40 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] naught101@lemmy.world 60 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Vex_Detrause@lemmy.ca 9 points 2 days ago

throws dentures at your feet

[–] BreadOven@lemmy.world 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I quite enjoy the amount of space between your eyebrows and chin.

[–] joker54@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 2 days ago (2 children)

It was a house fire. They won't grow back. Like my family.

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[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 40 points 2 days ago (2 children)

"i like your facial hair"

bro got very cozy very quickly

[–] Dagnet@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago

I still remember the one time someone said I have a great moustache

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[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 27 points 2 days ago (1 children)

What social media is selling are dopamine hits. Putting out hate and getting people worked up scores you a small dopamine hit. Getting an honest sounding compliment and having a stranger show interest and appreciation in something you are secretly very proud of, gets you an instant massive dopamine hit, followed by more little hits every time you remember the compliment.

[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 11 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Putting out hate and getting people worked up scores you a small dopamine hit.

It's a tough cycle to break out of if you find yourself in it.

[–] ChunkMcHorkle@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

So true. In a related tangent, without this, Fox News would have only ever been another shitty cable channel. I've been forced to watch it a few times by virtue of being in a place I couldn't leave, and it's full of this shit: words or pictures provoking anger, anger, anger, praise, fear, anger, anger, etc.

It's no wonder the watchers of it can't get off it: the world must feel very empty if you've been on a careening subliminal emotional rollercoaster of media intake for however long.

[–] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Let me try...

"You have a pretty mouth"

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 days ago

Fuck you and stfu.
And get your cock out and fuck my mouth if you like it so much...but don't touch my hair or so help me!!!

Also, I'm not gay.

Bring lube, just in case.

I'M NOT GAY!

[–] navigator@piefed.zip 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I don’t get hate DM’s but I do get an occasional message saying good things about my music when I post something. Then it turns out to be a scammer or someone offering whatever social media marketing scheme (which is probably a scam too).

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

That's so annoying. I'm going to start an anti-scamming fund. Any money you donate to this fund is guaranteed to not be used to benefit a scammer until it has been spent at least once more!

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 5 points 2 days ago

How long until they get to the gay sex?

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