this post was submitted on 21 Oct 2026
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top 45 comments
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[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 3 points 15 minutes ago (1 children)

Let's be real here. Elon Musk would find plenty of reasons to come at any puppet show.

(Because they are attended by children. The insinuation is that he is a pedophile, you see).

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 3 points 6 minutes ago

Elon loves children. Just ask Ghislaine.

They trained together

[–] Chozo@fedia.io 19 points 1 hour ago (2 children)

I wish he'd die by the sword already. Or any other instrument, really.

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 11 points 1 hour ago

My vote is for enlarged-infected-hemorrhoid disease.

[–] radiofreebc@lemmy.world 1 points 5 minutes ago

Rusty trombone

[–] enphurgen@lemmy.world 4 points 30 minutes ago (1 children)

Be careful! he studied the blade

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 3 points 27 minutes ago* (last edited 26 minutes ago)

Elon Musk has trained in Jiu Jitsu and is cringy and insecure as fuck.

Jonah Hill has trained in Jiu Jitsu and is cringy and insecure as fuck.

Who will survive?

Finally a cage match I'm willing to pay to watch.

[–] trojanbark@lemmy.world 5 points 37 minutes ago (1 children)

This guy is the ultimate definition of cringe

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 4 points 34 minutes ago (1 children)
[–] spacegoat@lemmy.world 10 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 50 minutes ago) (1 children)

That sounds like a credible threat of violence on Musks’s part. Deport

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 5 points 43 minutes ago

Damn right

I'm sick and tired of all these foreigners coming to my country, taking my tax dollars and using them on their vanity projects like flying cars and on top of it they threaten me with violence. ICE, arrest that man.

[–] Malica@lemmy.zip 6 points 51 minutes ago (2 children)

Has there ever existed a more pathetic person?

[–] obvs@lemmy.world 3 points 24 minutes ago

I mean, it really seems like there are a total of two people in contention at this point.

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 5 points 44 minutes ago (1 children)

Helen Keller once said, "the most pathetic person in the world is someone who has sight, but no vision," so by her expert opinion I'd say no, Elon is the most pathetic person ever.

[–] Malica@lemmy.zip 2 points 24 minutes ago (1 children)

His vision best represented by the Cybertruck.

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 2 points 3 minutes ago (1 children)

Awkward, dangerous, parts fly off of it and maim innocent by-standers, no one wants one, can't haul anything heavy without breaking, not easy to escape from, might burn you to death.

[–] Malica@lemmy.zip 1 points 43 seconds ago

The scariest part for me is that it's literally a giant kitchen knife on wheels. God help whatever it hits, deer or human.

[–] ImgurRefugee114@reddthat.com 3 points 2 minutes ago

I'm just gonna screenshot that first sentence for when he guys run over by a Tesla on autopilot

[–] LillyPip@lemmy.ca 3 points 36 minutes ago (1 children)

What a pathetic limp dicked dipshit. lol.

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 4 points 33 minutes ago

Thats the rumor. Sounds like a botched dick enlargement surgery according to the tweets.

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 11 points 1 hour ago (2 children)

I knew a guy who comes for puppets. He got a lap dance from Elmo once.

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 5 points 51 minutes ago

Elon Musk does look like a puppet when he flails around on stage during campaigns

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 4 points 1 hour ago

The guy from Beakmens World does erotic puppet shows these days.

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 2 points 29 minutes ago

Whose Jiu Jitsu is stronger? Elon Musk vs Jonah Hill

Probably would be a lot of high-pitch screeching in that match.

[–] MrSelfDestruct@quokk.au 2 points 35 minutes ago (1 children)

I wonder how many times Elon has cried to sleep?

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 3 points 33 minutes ago

I don't know of he can cry anymore what with all the cosmetic surgery he's had. Fucks up the tear ducts.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 26 points 2 hours ago (2 children)
[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 20 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

Are you kidding? The puppets would kick Elon's ass easily. They are much stronger than him.

[–] Sonotsugipaa@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 1 hour ago (2 children)

Hello puppet seller. I am going into twitter battle, and I want your strongest puppets.

My puppets are too strong for you, traveler.

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 3 points 1 hour ago

Make sure you buy puppets rated for fighting an adult man-child born to nazi-apartheid-loving parents.

[–] Pomal@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

He ain’t ever carried tools to drop

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 1 points 39 minutes ago (2 children)

I heard that his dick is all messed up from a failed enlargement surgery. Its believable because apparently Grimes said it to a friend of hers. Its also believable because Elon has definitely had cosmetic surgery, hair transplants, etc so I can totally see him trying to enlarge his dick and it failing (which isn't uncommon with such procedures.)

[–] Pomal@sh.itjust.works 1 points 21 minutes ago (1 children)
[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 1 points 5 minutes ago (1 children)

Thats what all his romantic partners said

[–] Pomal@sh.itjust.works 1 points 4 minutes ago
[–] obvs@lemmy.world 1 points 22 minutes ago* (last edited 22 minutes ago) (1 children)

You think he's get his weight taken care of.

Dear Lord, to have a trillion dollars, and to still look like Jabba the Hutt?

[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 1 points 3 minutes ago

Probably, Elon doesn't strike me as a "real change comes from the inside and takes years of hard work and self-reflection" type of guy.

[–] Rhaedas@fedia.io 17 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

That's not what Jesus meant, you dummy genius.

[–] Klear@piefed.world 8 points 1 hour ago

He was setting up the ending, where he - a carpenter - dies by being nailed to a piece of wood.

[–] Kintarian@lemmy.world 6 points 1 hour ago (1 children)
[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 7 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

Careful now. Elon rubbed his weewee against the leg of a flight attendant he hired (then required to get massaging lessons without actually paying her for taking the lessons) only to have his totally fair offer of buying her a horse in exchange for a happy ending be turned down. I guess he misinterpreted her talking to him as flirting. Probably made the mistake of using the word "come" in a sentence and Elon took it as a sign to wipe his dick out on her. True story.

[–] Kintarian@lemmy.world 5 points 1 hour ago (1 children)
[–] cardboardboxfort@lemmy.world 5 points 1 hour ago

Thing is Elon's always under-estimates his timelines so it stands to reason he'll under-estimate the puppet masters strength so Elon is likely to be crushed like a mosquito.