xkbx

joined 2 years ago
[–] xkbx@startrek.website 37 points 2 months ago

“Guys, I gotta take a HUGE shit. Also, I might be a while because I’ll be furiously masturbating.”

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 3 points 2 months ago

bless his coming and his going

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 4 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Your tone indicates anger, but your subject matter indicates something fun

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 5 points 2 months ago

Listen, sport, what you don’t understand is that you can be a great mechanic, but that doesn’t mean that you know SHIT about the race. Fact is, you’re gonna just carefully turn your corners, brake when you should accelerate, and stay in the pit when you could be circling those losers on two broken axles. Yeah, sure, you risk a little spinout once in a while. You just gotta get the car back straight and get in the race again. And yeah, you might crash. That’s why you wear a flame-retardant suit. And yeah, the fiery explosion might kill, maim, and injure all the fans, their children, burn all the small defenceless animals in the vicinity, and the resulting pollutants will likely give cancer to the staff & crew. But that’s what the insurance is for! And yeah, it’s expensive, but y’all got to get together and pool your money, or else people in the racing seat don’t get their trophies for winning, or exorbitant salaries as consolation prizes.

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)

No. I can’t explain it, really, but my dad knows a guy

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 18 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I mean did you even hear all the things she said?

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 5 points 2 months ago

I can’t do that, but I’ll put on a little red had and dance around

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I mean all you really need is two butt cheeks and a tight pair of shorts. The comments will come

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 14 points 2 months ago

what kind of jelly supremacist bullshit do you have to be on to merit this

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 12 points 2 months ago

Do not ask for which goon the goon goons for, it goons for thee

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 4 points 2 months ago

try your own feet first but then swallow

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