Oh so that's why he's incontinent, it's the evil witches.
this post was submitted on 27 Sep 2026
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One of them needs to hurry up and cast fireball.
Stupid sexy witches
A coven of witches cast harmful spells on a person day and night.
He becomes president of the USA, then a billionaire. He avoids jail time for serious crimes.
Wow, the power of witchcraft is staggering
Well, see, normally those evil spells would have reduced him to a gibbering idiot barely clinging to his health, but thanks to the constant prayers of good Christian MAGAs he is shielded by Jesus and remains an articulate stable genius in record breaking good health just as GOD ordained him to be.
barf
I know it's a joke, but the temptation to create a highly-targeted advertising campaign on Facebook soliciting "prayers for Trump" in exchange for cash from braindead boomers is really hard to ignore.
Like I know it's very morally wrong in general, and certainly unethical any way you slice it, but is it really still wrong if you're pointing those extremely granularly targeted ads toward people who definitely helped to screw us all over? (e.g. older folks in deep-red, HCOL areas who have high incomes and list Christianity as a personal interest)
Oh come on! We all know that this idea will be immediately converted to "prayers from Trump in exchange of cash" so that he can rip off his followers once more!
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https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/etsy-witch-charlie-kirk-curse-b2836089.html
I mean... just like any other skill, some witches are better at it than others.
Damn. When will it start working?
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Does that mean conservative Christians admit the president is not of sound mind?
admit
lolololol
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Clearly these witches powers are waining, is there anyway we can help?
I mean honestly if you're not supporting at least two Etsy witch covens then what are you doing with your life?
There are an odd amount of witches on etsy....
Always three, there are.
It just sucks that the one who did Kirk retired
Assume they operate on the theory that magic helps those that help themselves
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I mean the whole "conservative christians are crazy" is pretty well established and whatnot. This should be to no-ones surprise. Yet at the same time:
Witches? Really? That's the thing you're concerned about? In todays day and age where goosestepping idiots are robbing the world. Where the planet is literally on fire.
And you're worried some people might be wishing ill on mister wannabe hitler the pedo-rapist conman over there?
Let alone you're automatically assuming this about someome you dissagree with politically.
PROVE IT.
Careful now, historical witch trials have famously been fatally weighted against the accused...
Good point.
Are they trying to make me like AOC even more?
Yup, I can take the 2pm shift on Wednesdays... Where do I sign up? 🧙
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Why isn’t she more impactful at this??
Putin has more power over pedophile Trump.
Which does not mean much, as "Conservative Christian" is a sure sign of insanity.
I think it's about time we grow out of religious thinking
Problem is they don't like birth control. By design.
There is an actual book on how to curse Trump I have seen it.
Is that the one where he raped a child and she bit his dick so he hit her?
I'm close with a wiccan priestess and I can assure you AOC has nothing to do with the endeavor
Thus explaining why it doesn't work.
Where can I sign up?
If you figure out, let me know. I could use a coven, especially one with such noble goals.
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Conservative Christians - the ones who are so Nationalist?
Nat-C’s, if you will
Nice. She has my vote.
Not being terribly effective, unfortunately.
Religion is a mental illness.
🫡 thanks for your service
They just reuse stuff, used to be larry nickles talking about hillary clinton going to witch church, a church for witches, witches... witches
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In a postindustrial society, in the third decade of the 21st century of the common era, a plurality of the population believe in witchcraft.
This is why I have little to no hope for our future.
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